Going Places I should Not Go

It is so strange-packing up pieces of your life. Now, when I look for something, it's in a box somewhere. We have been in this house 11 years! We have a lot of stuff! It was a mistake though, to sort through all the files in my desk. I should have just moved everything in the file from desk to box and not looked

But No! I looked and was surprised.

Reactions:

Wow! I sure would have written that piece differently today!
Wow! This is worst than mindless moronic dribble I have ever read. It has been left on the basketball court far too long!
Wow! This is fantastic! Did I really write this? ... checks name. YES! It's Mine!
Wow! This piece would be great if only... edit... type, type, type, squint, edit, spell check, edit...

By now, it is 5 AM and I have been up all night, Then I notice D. is awake.

"Wow! Look what I found! It's so funny! I can't believe I wrote this! Do you want to hear it? " (No answer) Groans do NOT count as answers.

Sigh...

What will I miss about living in this house- the only house we ever owned... well, we didn't actually .. the bank and others.. oh well..

I'll miss the birds singing at 6 AM (especially the doves that nested in a tree by the porch.)

I'll miss the pond and all the creatures that visit and live there and all there and sounds they make. The foxes that denned under our mini barn, the wild bunnies, the blue heron, the geesse and ducks, the bull frogs and yes, even the red-winged blackbirds that dive bomb when you dare walk to the water's edge and sit under the willow trees.

I'll miss the peach and cherry tree S. planted when he was just a kid. The birds snatched all the cherries but we had some nice peaches to feast on for a while. First time this year!

I'll miss walking out on the deck at 2 or 3 AM, and standing at the rail watching the moon and listening to the night sounds.

The house is easy to leave. It is just a house. It needs much repair, part our own fault but most is fault in learning. Check first before purchasing if there is a class action law suit going on because the siding is defective...

One thing I wish I had done though and did because I was foolish, I will have to deal with. I buried my 4 bunnies in the flower bed by the front porch. I wanted them close by but I should have buried them out back somewhere where they would less likely be disturbed. So, I have decided the only ting I can do for them is to write a note and put it in a bottle and bury it with the top exposed in hopes some curious kind person will discover and dig gently.

this not the material for a blog I suppose but these are my thoughts on this day and it is my blog. I had a web site for years, I kept a journal. It is gone now too and I sorely regret I didn't take the time and transfer those thoughts to hard copy, but at the time, there were too many other things pushing and pulling ..demanding I do this or do that, so, I just deleted the account. I am sorry now. Those days recorded are lost.. like the time I was surprised and happy to learn a bunny was living under the mini barn.. that was before the foxes. I left him carrots in the snow. Deaths of loved ones, passing of friends, what being a friend actually means, Monkeys, happy days and sad. sigh

Foolish foolish! I should NOT be writing this today. It is not constructive and is not positive and it is making me cry. I don' tknow why. So I will end and occupy my mind with laundry, piles of scattered stuff I don't know what to do with, dishes and other things that lurk in corners and sneer at me. But before I do that, I will go sit on the deck and listen for the bullfrogs and ducks. END.